No my poor little livejournal, I have not neglected you, though it may seem.

I've been doing what I do best - rping, that is.

Amanda and I opened a game last weekend on GreatestJournal, called Revelation. A week prior to the game starting we had over 30 characters. OVER THIRTY!! AND WE'RE STILL GETTING APPLICATIONS!! It makes me sooooooo happy.

In other roleplaying news, I am now apart of 4 games with 2 applications pending. *whoot*

I also snazzed up my character development journal here. Yes. I've migrated to greatestjournal. As for actual journal keeping? That's been moved to Xanga for a while. But as of late, I've preferred to actually write my entries rather than type. It gives them a more intimate feel to my memories, knowing exactly what I was thinking when I wrote something.

I tried to explain that to Grandma while we were at Wal*Mart looking at different journals. "Why don't you just type a journal? You're on the computer enough. *chuckle*" *eyeroll* She didn't understand when I was telling her how it felt to actually write something than to sit here and type up whatever thoughts I have in the two minutes it takes for me to type up an entry like this. Yes. Writing takes ever so much more time, but in the end, I feel it does me better.

Don't worry, my ickle livejournal. I'm not abandoning you. I've gotten into the mood where I actually like the icons I'm making now. =D So, I still need you to post them in basicbases. *dance*

Au revoir, mon ami.

What, may I ask, did I do to deserve this hell?

I came home last night after having a rather fun time with Anna and Mason in Boone to find that Mom had called in my absence. Why? To say "Hey Brooke. Just wondering how you're doing. Hope school's going well and all that jazz"?

No.

It was to tell me that she needed me to babysit today around 3. Didn't even stop to think that I may have other plans (which I did). And seeing as I would have to stay until my stepdad came home (and there was no telling what time that would be) my plans were cancelled.

So if I wasn't mad enough about that in itself, I certainly am now. Mom called today around 1 to say that my stepfather came home early. However, (and I quote) "The kids really miss you, so if you don't care, would you still ride over anyways?" So, I went to Mom's with the hope that surely I could still go see a play tonight. I don't mind spending time with the kids. Not in the least. And I figured I would be over there til about 5. My stepdad had planned to come over to my house so he could watch "The Race" with Dad. So that too led me to believe I'd only be there for a couple of hours. But no. My stepdad went to sleep. Until 6:30. We got home at 7. The play started at 7:30. And I knew Dad wouldn't take me. Especially with Garrett and Cheyenne here.

So for the past 3 hours, I've been stuck here listening to the shrill laughter and arguing of my brother and sister. Not that I'm not used to that. But try to read with the two of them jumping on your waterbed and completely trashing your room. Not an easy feat. So I gave up on the reading and thought maybe that I could live through rping. At first, this worked out well. But now greatestjournal has failed me and refuses to load.

And now I wait. For the next two hours by myself. On Adam and Anna to get home. *sigh*

I'm bound and determined to go to that play tomorrow night. I swear I'll kill anyone who tries to stop me. Fucking asshats.

Sitting here, listening to the rain fall (and the incredibly wonderful sounds of Emilie Autumn) I decided that I ought to write something. Actual writing has been something that's been escaping me more and more often and that really irks me. My written journal lacks about 20 pages from being filled. It'd only take a little determination and time for me fill the remaining pages. But I've just not been in one of those wonderful writing moods that seemed to have escaped my grasp.

I hope everyone's had a great three-day weekend. Mine's been one of those where you're freaking estatic one day and just so far down in the dumps the next you doubt you'll ever see sunlight again. So I'll start with the beginning of my weekend and share with you all what made me so happy. Friday evening, my grandmother called, asking if I wanted to accompany her and my aunt to Lenoire to my cousin's game (fuck... 6 year old who's already a cheerleader... the girl's doomed) and she also said they'd be going to Hickory to go shopping. Interest peaked, I agreed... with one condition: a journey to Hot Topic must be made. I am a frequent visitor to the store's website, but never before have I shopped there (went to the one in Concord Mills once with my cousin and her husband... they didn't buy me anything though... I think they were kind of scared). Surprisingly, my grandmother agreed. I believe she thought that we wouldn't find Hot Topic in the Valley Hills mall. So with this promise of Hot Topic, I slept wonderfully Friday night. Even being woken at 7 am on a Saturday didn't irk me all because of the Hot Topic prospect. Though, I nearly killed myself watching the lot of retarded 6-10 year olds jumping and cheering on their pathetic little football team. Sigh. I spent the hour we were there reading the Chickenheart script and drawing on my hand.

And so I survived the bloody game. And we made our way to Valley Hills mall. The first place we stopped was the Food Court, of course. My two gluttonous cousins made it a point to my aunt and grandmother that they refused to behave lest they get food. (not that they behaved even with the food) Subway was the only thing I could decide upon that wouldn't clog my arteries and so I enjoyed my 6-inch Turkey Sub and waited for my relatives to finish their own feasting upon the variety that is the Food Court. And the first store we went into? Hot Topic. Oh how delighted I was. Upon seeing the store, I let out my well known Harry Potter scream and dashed right in. What shocked me was that my grandmother actually accompanied me inside. Yes, she did. And not only that, but she also purchased three things for me while I was there... 1) a PotC tank top for only about $5 ... 2) some Thigh High fishnets (which I squeed like fuck over) for about $6 ... Aaaand 3) A corset that was set originally at $42, marked down to $20.80 and finally on clearance for $10. Excited? Fuck yes I was. I mean, it's not an actual corset because the staves (sp) are plastic rather than metal, but I'm not complaining [a lot]. The rest of that day was trying not to kill my cousins while we walked around the mall.

Then yesterday was just one of those days where I was just "Meh. Not good, not bad." But it's closer to the good extreme rather than the bad. I spent the evening shooting my aunt's old bow and arrows. I had been using my cousins kiddie bow and arrows with no fletching, but my grandfather actually pulled out my aunt's (*surprised*) and helped me shoot it. Yes, I needed help I'll admit. Though, I did manage to pull it back almost 3-4 times on my own. And I did shoot an arrow into the roof of a shed... which was freaking hilarious because my grandfather was all "You'll have to stand on my shoulders to get it down" and I jumped down there and pulled it straight out of the roof no problem. And I was wearing my fishnets and pink boots... and I just felt like a Zelda character (which I think came from the boots, bow, and Adam's Zelda talk most of the weekend). So last night I expressed my geeky pleasures and was running and jumping and just plain romping out as if I was a Zelda character. Mmm... don't scoff. You know you'd do it too.

And I was just so tired last night, I went to bed early. The irony in this? I didn't sleep as well as I should have for being so sleepy. Horrid dreams. At least, they were to me. Others may not think so. But they were. At least, the intensity of my emotions in the dream lingered to this morning. So I woke up in tears and just sat on my bed and bawled. And that feeling has remained with me throughout the day, despite the comforts of my greatest friends. And my day has steadily grown worse since Summer came home. Surprisingly, Summer once again told me she hated me. Mm... That doesn't hurt in the least, Summer... Thanks a lot for making my day ten times worse than what it was. And to make matters worse, she and Dad were just in the living room yelling down one another's throats again.

Sigh.

While that certainly relieved me, I'm sure I made several of your heads explode from boredom and sheer WTFage. So now I shall go, indulge myself in supper then probably read Beowulf.

Muchas love,
Tabbie

It is incredibly difficult to talk on AIM, update one's livejournal AND talk on the phone at the sometime. O.o Brooke is a multitasker!!! Huzzah for the first entry on my new computer, Sir Roland!! My father hooked up the internet in my computer today.

I suppose that I actually have something of interest to update about now. o.O Go me. As it turns out, my grandparents, who have been married for a total of 36 years, are now getting a divorce. Now there's lots of complication in this little soap opera episode.

About 5-6 years ago, my grandfather had an affair. x_x They were split up for about a month. And NOW, after 36 years, he's decided that he's unhappy. Yeah. Bitch ass thing to do, right? We own some land on the Parkway and have a trailer up there, where he is now going to be living. He's supposed to talk to my dad and aunt about it sometime and then he's supposed to talk to the four of us grandchildren. I'm not exactly certain how I'm supposed to react towards this. I mean... for fuck's sake. I am so pissed off right now, just hearing this from my dad. No, I'm not personally upset for the fact he's actually leaving, which makes me feel bad. But I'm pissed off for the sake of my grandmother and my aunt and father. I have only seen my father cry once - and that was when my parents first split up. And [I think. It looked like it, but it was dark so I could have been seeing things] he was on the verge again today. It really just bothers me seeing my dad upset.

And I just can't get over how my grandfather is just fucking himself over! I mean, what the hell. Can he not see just how he is breaking his family apart? The ironic thing out of this, is his 8 year old grandson, who IDOLIZES THE HELL out of my grandfather is pissed the fuck off as well. I just wonder how well this is going to go over with my grandfather.

And another thing that tears me up about this is that it just has to happen when things are finally looking up for me. I mean, honestly. Apparently, Fate isn't content with letting me be completely happy with my life. If things are fine in my family, my personal life sucks ass. And if my personal life is FINALLY going well, then my family is all to hell.

... and now I feel like a loser for seeing how that rhymed. O.o

So that was my perfect day today. Wow. Impressive how much I can complain within the time it took to type that. Which was surprisingly a lot seeing as I was on the phone and talking to two people on AIM whilst listening to yahoo!music.

Now I am in fear of my life as the gargantuan Japanese Hornet flies about my room, trying to keeeeeeel me. o.O

-Muchas lurve, Tabbie

Is your first day of your last year in high school supposed to be so drawn out? Today has been possibly one of the longest days ever. Hell, I'm typing with my freaking eyes closed. O.O ... okay... that was some need to know info, wasn't it?

My schedule consists of
First: Foods and Nutrition I
Second: Vocal Music III
Third: English IV Honors
Fourth: Precalculus

Foods will be rather simple and easy I think - the fact that I can't cook worth a flip means nothing ... right? Vocal Music [Ensemble] will also be simple, well other than learning music. Which really makes up for English. Oh it pleases me. I believe that my English teacher will be one of those that actually challenges his students. The last teacher to do that for me was my Biology teacher. I was supposed to have read Wuthering Heights by today. It was the last thing of my summer assignment. And I spent most of my waking hours reading it. But I didn't finish it. I'm only about halfway finished. So I respect yet resent my teacher for giving us a quotes quiz today. Out of 17 questions, I answered 8. Or was it 7? Now, as for Precalculus... Math and I have never really gotten along well. However, the teacher seems to be sweet and the class is small, so I think I may enjoy it and actually learn some things. Which is always good.

The main complaints I've had with today is the numerous perks of being a senior were somewhat stolen from us - because of construction on the school. Construction that we will never enjoy the fruits of. You see, as seniors, we would have the privelege to park in the upper parking lot rather than the one down the steep hill of hell. We would be able to sit out on the splendifferous patio and enjoy our lunch. However, due to this construction of doom, neither will be awarded to us. Though, outdoor lunch is still available in the courtyard, which pleases me.

And just so it is known... quite the epiphany nearly struck me dead this evening when I arrived home.

My name: Autumn Brooke Faw means, respectively "Mature", "From the brook", and "dwellers of beech trees". And Faw being German only adds to the meaning.

My name obviously means that I am an Old, German, Beechtree dwelling Fish. Go me.

Now I want to watch Rocky Horror Picture Show. Damnit.

Okay... the best conversation I've ever had with an AIM bot.... You know you love them.

( I'm just a fucktard )

Le Boredness struck early this morning. And the fact that I've been meaning to make these the past few days...

( It's only two fucking icons, so piss off! )

For my love that is the almighty Tricia, owner of my socks.

( Rulers of the world )

( Hesorkia at it's best )

I have never laughed so fucking hard in my life. I freaking heart you, Tricia!!!


( HESTIA AS A HOBBIT! )

( Quizzes for Tabbie )